You Can't Sit With Us

I remember being in middle school, standing in the cafeteria, scanning the scene for a place to sit. You would have thought it was the 1960's. Each corner of the cafeteria was taken by different racial groups. As a woman who sees herself as both white AND black, choosing a place to sit in the cafeteria caused a lot of anxiety during those years.

Fast forward to college, and the dining hall mimicked what I saw in middle school. I would get the “you can’t sit with us” glare from people who didn’t look like me.

Reality was, NOBODY looked like me, and I was stuck feeling anxious and lonely. I can recall a time when a girl from my floor asked “Why do all of the black people sit together?” “It’s easy,” I said. Unbeknownst to me, I was calling attention to how racially homogeneous sub-cultures further perpetuate white supremacy (Cabrera, 2014, p. 33). The innocent girl from my floor had no idea how uncomfortable people of color often feel in dining halls and other public spaces. She saw it as a means to “self-segregate”, but it was really a means of coping and finding solace in a place they feel isn’t “for them”. She had no idea how feeling comfortable and safe in a campus space is a privilege, and many students of the racial majority have the ability to isolate themselves from racial interactions with people of color (Cabrera, 2014, p.32). The ability to make a choice to isolate is the privilege itself.

Now, as a first year graduate student having to navigate finding the perfect seat in a crowded campus center or library, I am often overwhelmed seeing these same spaces segregated much like the 1960's. As I scan for open seats and make eye contact with the people close by, I am still met with the “you can’t sit with us” glare, and I am still saddened to think we haven’t come much farther than we once were.

Reference:

Cabrera, N. L. (2014). Exposing whiteness in higher education: White male college students minimizing racism, claiming victimization, and recreating white supremacy. Race, Ethnicity, and Education,17(1), 30-­55. Retrieved from http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/13613324.2012.725040?needAccess=true